...(then, it’s been that kinda week or two...so hot and
muggy, relaxation is exhausting...and
not relaxing even more so....thinking, of course, is always difficult...but not
nearly as hard as not thinking....right
now, I’m escaping the worst of the heat in someone else’s house, practicing
yoga to Sonic Youth and John Coltrane in an air-conditioned room, with a
boisterous young dog named Raffi who wants to wrestle....wrestling with a dog
while in full padmasana might count as yoga, I think...calming him down with a
scratch behind the ears while in supta baddha konasana definitely does)...
...Wednesday night meditation class wasn’t easy, either....sat
there for the whole forty five minutes, though that restless, fidgety, and
utterly unfocused thing I was doing would fit with only the most liberal
definitions of meditation...the most
I could say for myself was that I stayed, even if paying a whole hell of a lot
more attention to so-slowly moving hands of the clock on the wall than to my
breath...wondering what on earth I was doing in this room with all these good,
tranquil-minded meditators sitting so calm and serene...
...and yet, it occurred to me, my mind is a lot like the
teenagers in my yoga class...belonging on the cushion all the more for its
failure at anything resembling stillness...