...have a tendency to beat up on myself...what a jerk I am for doing that...just kidding...
...seriously, though, Amy Weintraub said something about how we tend to say horrible things to ourselves that we’d never think of saying to a friend or family member or, really, anybody...and it’s true...if you were eating breakfast at my house, I would not call you a stupid fucking asshole for spilling a little bit of soymilk on my crummy easy chair that should’ve been thrown in the dumpster months ago, anyway...but when I do it?...bring on the foul mouthed Grand Inquisitor...
...I can work with maximum security prisoners and have little problem seeing beyond armed robberies, rapes, and murders...really...but if I’m too lazy to do anything productive all afternoon...or blow it with that kind, smart, beautiful woman who seemed like she wanted to get to know me better...or fail to put up a blog post for nearly a week (seriously...the last one was on Thursday, and today's Wednesday, for chrissake...)...here come the thumbscrews, the rack, the guillotine...
...and yet, sometimes, even I get a reprieve...like forgetting my mom’s birthday, which, as it turns out, is today....a few hours ago my brother called and mentioned it...mid-afternoon, still an acceptable time to call up and let her know I’m taking her out to dinner tonight...so, instead of beating myself up, for this evening, I get to enjoy a nice dinner out with mom...it’s all good...for now...
